I know me. If I don’t find enjoyment in doing something, I’m not going to follow through. If I don’t have a deep motivation for WHY I am doing something, I won’t stay with it.
Some people are able to go the gym every morning, even when they don’t feel like it, because it’s “what they do.” This doesn’t work for me. I am highly self-motivated and disciplined, but if I don’t WANT to do something, it’s not going to happen.
And so it’s been a challenge to find ways to connect with my physical body.
I don’t mean just exercising, working out, lifting weights and losing weight, I mean really connecting with my body.
I know that, as in touch as I am with my heart and my thoughts, until I am just as connected with my physical body, the big shifts that I desire can’t happen.
And so, many weeks ago I set an intention to find new ways to connect in my body.
Without a clear idea of what that would look like, I opened up to possibilities. I’ve been able to schedule in a second yoga class some weeks. I attended a friend’s Creative Movement class where we expressed emotions with our bodies. As hard as it was to move and breathe, it felt true, right, and I remembered how I used to move in my own living room years ago, dancing out the grief that I couldn’t express in my journal. And it was dancing that slimmed my waistline and taught me balance and flexibility and re-awakened my sexuality.
Moving to wordless rhythms, the beat of drums, called me back into myself and I knew that this kind of moving is my way back into my body.
Within two days of that class, an invitation arrived in my inbox to attend a workshop with Nina Wise in Big Sur. I was excited beyond myself.
I have been wanting to work with her and her practice of Motion Theater ever since I bought her book A Big, New, Free, Happy, Unusual Life in 2003. But schedules, circumstances and old beliefs prevented me.
Until now.
In so many ways, this was a dream come true. The funny part is, when I first received the email, I actually heard myself say, “Let me think about it.” Then I heard myself answer “Really? You know you want this. What is there to think about?”
And so, last week, I traveled to a most beautiful place on the California coast, immersed in a workshop that was all about connecting in my body and expressing without thinking. I combined sounds with movement to express what words cannot reveal, moving deep into my cells where memories reside and shaking them loose, releasing the old stories into new ones that I can joyfully dance into.
I’m sure that this is where my work is. I know that this is how I can best connect with my physical body. Dancing. Moving. Exploring and expressing where even words cannot go.
And I’m excited for all the ways that I will bring my body back to myself. And how I will choose to share it all with you.
How do you connect with your physical body? I’d love for you to share by clicking the comments below.
Hi Ruth,
Wishing you lots of success on your journey to connect in new ways with your body!
I’m a beginner at it, too, and I’m happy to be on the path. I wasn’t even IN my body until a couple years ago. I’ve been led to Pilates, where I’ve been able to release lots of tight, compacted places, opening my shoulders, etc., and this has led to more grounding, clearer intuitive guidance, more self care in the way of massages, Rolfing, and naps….ways to listen to and honor my physical self.
How wonderful that you could live into your dream of attending Nina Wise’s workshop!!! (Thank you…I’ve ordered the book…I’d never heard of her or it, and it looks amazing.)
Blessings,
Joy
Joy, Thanks for sharing. Isn’t it so funny that we can go through our lives thinking we are connected? Here’s to opening all of those tight, compacted places to let in more lightness, more love!
Interestingly enough, lately during doodles and journaling, I have come to the question: when did I stop dancing? I used to really inhabit my body when I danced. I don’t dance anymore! Working in clay brings me back into my body, but I didn’t need to come back into it – I was already there – all the time – when I was dancing! I take this as another shove in the right direction. So glad you honored yourself! And I’m so right there with you with the “if I don’t like it I’m not going to do it!”
How cool that working in clay, the earth’s body, brings you into your own. So when are you going to start dancing? Doesn’t have to be a huge ordeal. Just turn on some music and start moving!